


Do you know?

by BarricadeGhost1832



Category: Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: Coming Out, FTM, Fluff, Grantaire is a Good Boyfriend (Les Misérables), M/M, Trans Enjolras, Trans Male Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-17
Updated: 2021-03-17
Packaged: 2021-03-26 04:40:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,319
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30100434
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BarricadeGhost1832/pseuds/BarricadeGhost1832
Summary: Enjolras comes out as trans to his boyfriend.
Relationships: Enjolras/Grantaire (Les Misérables)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 32





	Do you know?

**Author's Note:**

> Title from Falsettos - A Day In Falsettoland  
> (Or More Raquetball, either work)

Enjolras is Grantaire’s girlfriend. 

But he’s not.

Nothing about this situation is right. He’s living a lie, he’s lied to Grantaire, he’s lied to everyone. 

This situation used to be comforting. This situation itself is being curled up on the couch in the brunet’s apartment. 

“R.” He starts, “I- we need to talk.”

Grantaire repositions himself to look Enjolras in the eyes. “Is it important?”

“It is.” 

Grantaire gives a small nod, his face a mix of confusion and scepticism.

“I don’t exactly know how to start, but I need to say it.” Enjolras takes a deep breath. There is a nagging pain in his chest. All he wants to do is curl back up in Grantaire’s arms and cuddle for hours until he forgets about this, but he owes him the truth. He opens his mouth a few times before cutting himself off by closing his mouth. The words are harder to say than he had expected, he rehearsed this for hours, it should be simple. 

But with Grantaire, nothing is simple, everything is complex, but something about just being around his boyfriend makes things easier, like the complexity doesn’t matter.

But not right now. Right now everything is more difficult than it needs to be.

“Are you okay?” Grantaire asks, he reaches out an arm towards Enjolras’ shoulder. Enjolras flinches at the contact, Grantaire swallows visibly, his face in a state of shock. He returns to his spot on the opposite side of the couch, putting enough distance between the two of them to not make Enjolras uncomfortable.

But dammit this is worse.

Now that Grantaire is in a clear state of worry and shock, it’s Enjolras’ job to fix it. 

“Grantaire, our relationship is very important to me, but I, uh. I.” He lets out a shaky breath, his eyes starting to prickle with tears. This is not how it was supposed to go. 

“Okay uh,” he goes to wipe the tears from his eyes before they fall, but he has to clench his fist to stop his hands from shaking. “R, I’m trans.” ‘There, you said it.’ Enjolras’ mind says.

“Oh.” Grantaire blinks.

He just blinks.

Enjolras tries to close his eyes to stop his tears, but it only aids in pushing them further down his cheeks. 

He does the same opening-and-closing mouth thing Enjolras did a few seconds ago. And if Enjolras’ vision weren’t blurred with tears he might giggle at how Grantaire looks a little like the fish at the pet store.

Grantaire always had a knack for getting Enjolras to giggle, Courfeyrac had thought it impossible before Grantaire had made a (very) lame joke causing the fearless leader Enjolras to laugh. (He was the only one who laughed, unsurprisingly)

“He/Him?” Grantaire asks.

When he finally looks up again Grantaire has barely moved, but he’s looking right back at Enjolras, wide eyed, but not from surprise, there is something softer in them now.

Enjolras nods. trying not to look Grantaire in the eyes. “So, I understand if you don’t want to continue dating, or something I understand, I know you’re not gay, and I don’t want to force anything on you, so just, do what you need to.” The inability to speak what was on his mind has now been replaced with rambling. Enjolras isn’t sure which is worse. “I knew someone who dated a trans person before they transitioned and it can be confusing, but whatever you wan-”

“What’s your name?”

“Uh,” Enjolras takes a moment to think about it, “I haven’t chosen one yet, I’m still going by my last name.” 

“Can I still call you Ange?”

Enjolras nods again, “But I get it if you don’t want to.” He adds.

Enjolras sniffles, he feels Grantaires’ eyes boring into him, but he forces himself to look away, not being able to face the inevitable pity that will settle itself in his boyfriend’s features. 

“Ange, you know I still love you, nothing has changed that. And I’m here for you. I can cut your hair, or order you a binder, you can even borrow my clothes if you need to. But even if you want none of that, if you don’t want to put up society’s bullshit and gender norms, then I’ll go dress shopping with you, I will stand with you. But, if you do ever need a place to stay, my door is open.” He pauses, continuing to brush Enjolras’ cheek with his thumb. “I would very much like to stay your boyfriend. If you also want to be mine?”

Enjolras lets out a shaky sob before nodding, sometime during Grantaire’s speech he started to cry heavy tears. Grantaire gives him a sweet smile, before once again pulling him into a hug. This time, Enjolras reciprocates without hesitation, he clings to his boyfriend. His boyfriend, words he worried he would have to stop associating with Grantaire. 

Sure, Enjolras can be himself with Les Amis, but with Grantaire, he can truly be free. Grantaire has seen him at his worst, crying over a failed test, or in the middle of a panic attack, and Grantaire has always comforted him in the ways he knows will work. 

Grantaire is the first boyfriend Enjolras has had who respects his asexuality. The first person he’s come out to. 

“I love you.” Enjolras whispers. He finds himself smiling absentmindedly, he won't try to deny the warm feeling of joy spreading across his chest. 

They eventually part to rearrange themselves into a more comfortable cuddling position, Enjolras curling up into Grantaire’s side.

“And, I don’t want to overshadow your coming out, but I feel like you need a little truth too, I’m bisexual, so none of that ‘wait am I gay?’ stuff will happen, since I’m already kinda gay.”

Enjolras lets out a strangled laugh, Grantaire loops his fingers in Enjolras’ long curls. 

“Maybe I’ll take you up on that haircut offer?” Enjolras says, his hair almost reaches his hips, and as much as he loves his golden locks, he knows it will help him feel more masculine. “Can I stay with you tonight?” 

“Of course. Um,” Grantaire pauses. Something weighing on him, fear rises in Enjolras’ chest for a moment, before it is easily soothed by Grantaire’s words, which happen to create their own terror, “How have your parents taken it?

“They don’t know. But they won't take it well.” Enjolras’ voice is smaller than he intended, but not without reason.

“You don’t have to tell them.”

“They’ll find out eventually,” Enjolras says grievously. “I live with them.”

“You don’t have to.” Grantaire states the obvious. 

“Well, yes I could try to rent an apartment, or I could move somewhere on campus, or I think Courf might be looking for a roommate. Or-” He looks abruptly at Grantaire, “Were you offering-”

“That you could move in here.” Grantaire finishes for him, shrugging. “It’s okay, I know I wouldn’t be your first choice.”

“Why wouldn’t you? You’re my boyfriend? I would love to live with you.”

“You would?” Grantaire’s voice is woven with confusion, yet simultaneously threaded with hope.

“Yes, I would. R, I love you.” 

“I love you too.” Grantaire says, a smile tight on his lips, it’s nothing like the shallow sort of smiles Grantaire paints on occasionally, but a full eye to eye beaming smile. Enjolras is pretty sure his expression matches his boyfriend’s.

It strikes Enjolras that he didn’t need to worry, he never did, not that it will stop him from doing so. But he has Grantaire, and Grantaire has him, and Grantaire isn’t going to leave, neither will he. 

Like opposite sides of a coin, though different, united and inseparable, a juxtaposition. But differences never stopped them, Enjolras doubts in this moment that anything could, because you can’t separate the moon from the sun, or the island from the sea, all those are sure, as are Enjolras and Grantaire.

**Author's Note:**

> Leave comments/kudos if you wish!


End file.
